It was more my dream for Harry than perhaps it was his, so maybe the shift was harder on me. But we were co-designing a project together via animal communication and then suddenly, I was devastated. Just plain devastated. I never saw it coming. Perhaps I misunderstood the complexity of Harry's physical condition. But September and October was a time period that would very suddenly challenge and even threaten the Starkitty Project. Though through great loss and tremendous upset we are still here, I still grapple with the irony of it all. Prince Harry from Sirius B, yet another dog spirit in cat body, died suddenly in my arms from a heart attack. It was as swift a crossing as Sweet Pea's was, which was a passing that had leveled me for quite a bit of time. The absolute stun of any sudden crossing is a most uncomfortable experience. While there are gifts always in losses, this forced parting from Harry couldn't have come at a worst time. And I still don't see the gift in it quite fully yet - though the animals have given me Psy data to sooth my perceived loss.
Harry, since birth was special. Born with virtually no front paws, Harry was in training to be a therapy kitty. He went shopping at stores, swam in the tub, skittered about the house with the ease of any normal healthy kitten. Everyone who saw him fell instantly in love with him. ALL of the Starkittys at the Starkitty Ranch loved Harry. He'd been gifted with a veterinarian's dedicated service to him the first four months of his life, as his feet and elbows were constantly bound to give him opportunity for proper leg movement. He spent his first few months between Dr. Ellen and Diane's house, a local rehabber who helped to transport him for his bi-weekly visits to the vet. While a heart murmur had been detected and a warning was given that as he got older he may encounter more troublesome heart problems - every outward sign from Harry was a picture of pure health and he was still, so young! At a year and half, he stood up on his hind legs all the time and had amazing agility despite the few nubbed toes he had. He often raced around the house, and his zest for life may have been ultimately too much for the damaged heart he was born with.
Eager to partake in the very first publicly 'formal human honoring' of service dogs of America, in early September I'd crammed in on top of my two jobs, two additional events - one which was set to take place in LA. It was a chaotic and highly stressful time and just prior to the big rollout, I'd very suddenly experienced chest pains that told me unequivocably - to SLOW DOWN. Amidst emergency tests for a stress related heart problem, I was jamming in yet two more big events on top of a heavy two job workload. Maintaining the Starkitty ranch is a job in itself. And no one pays me to do that! Very suddely, Mama Kitty's foot needed attention. Long running legal issues regarding my home morgage issue kicked up. Hurricane Irene hit. The crew brought in fleas from the outdoor kennel and I was literally beseiged with way more on my plate than I could handle. But what do you do when a storm rolls in but try to bunker down and get thru it? And so I did - until the very night Harry died in my arms. For several weeks I battled the anger of my choice to pile on, of all things, a series of outside 'service dog events' when my very own 'therapy kitty in training' was apparently dying right before my own eyes. What had I missed in the days preceding? How could I not perceive Harry was in trouble? Wtih all of my psy skills I've always found it ironic that the most obvious things - those things that hover right under one's nose - are the very hardest to detect. I am saving his full story for the book. Because when it was explained what he did as he crossed - I can only give hint that it actually saved my life. And yes, I have communicated with Harry from beyond. He is currently in an ethereal training camp of sorts, learning how to be of even better service to humanity, before he reincarnates again. And I laugh at Harry's description of his ethereal life now because he was a STELLAR healing kitty, just as he was! I did for several weeks, feel Harry's presence right there in my heart - in a way that cannot easily be expained.
My dream for my life with Harry in the physical body he once had has crashed big time but the felines are Psy educating me that there's more to the picture, and they have urged me not to throw away Harry's gift to me with thoughts of regret. It was his conscious choice to offer me a gift thru his death he says. He told me that when I'd laid hands on him to heal him out of heart trauma he was able to see directly into my own heart - and that's where he made a split second decision to lift pressure off my ailing heart and take it with him. I cried for days upon hearing that. Harry's happy now he says. But in all honesty I still, am not.
It was more my dream for Harry than perhaps it was his, so maybe the shift was harder on me. But we were co-designing a project together via animal communication and then suddenly, I was devastated. Just plain devastated. I never saw it coming. Perhaps I misunderstood the complexity of Harry's physical condition. But September and October was a time period that would very suddenly challenge and even threaten the Starkitty Project. Though through great loss and tremendous upset we are still here, I still grapple with the irony of it all. Prince Harry from Sirius B, yet another dog spirit in cat body, died suddenly in my arms from a heart attack. It was as swift a crossing as Sweet Pea's was, which was a passing that had leveled me for quite a bit of time. The absolute stun of any sudden crossing is a most uncomfortable experience. While there are gifts always in losses, this forced parting from Harry couldn't have come at a worst time. And I still don't see the gift in it quite fully yet - though the animals have given me Psy data to sooth my perceived loss.
Harry, since birth was special. Born with virtually no front paws, Harry was in training to be a therapy kitty. He went shopping at stores, swam in the tub, skittered about the house with the ease of any normal healthy kitten. Everyone who saw him fell instantly in love with him. ALL of the Starkittys at the Starkitty Ranch loved Harry. He'd been gifted with a veterinarian's dedicated service to him the first four months of his life, as his feet and elbows were constantly bound to give him opportunity for proper leg movement. He spent his first few months between Dr. Ellen and Diane's house, a local rehabber who helped to transport him for his bi-weekly visits to the vet. While a heart murmur had been detected and a warning was given that as he got older he may encounter more troublesome heart problems - every outward sign from Harry was a picture of pure health and he was still, so young! At a year and half, he stood up on his hind legs all the time and had amazing agility despite the few nubbed toes he had. He often raced around the house, and his zest for life may have been ultimately too much for the damaged heart he was born with. 
Eager to partake in the very first publicly 'formal human honoring' of service dogs of America, in early September I'd crammed in on top of my two jobs, two additional events - one which was set to take place in LA. It was a chaotic and highly stressful time and just prior to the big rollout, I'd very suddenly experienced chest pains that told me unequivocably - to SLOW DOWN. Amidst emergency tests for a stress related heart problem, I was jamming in yet two more big events on top of a heavy two job workload. Maintaining the Starkitty ranch is a job in itself. And no one pays me to do that! Very suddely, Mama Kitty's foot needed attention. Long running legal issues regarding my home morgage issue kicked up. Hurricane Irene hit. The crew brought in fleas from the outdoor kennel and I was literally beseiged with way more on my plate than I could handle. But what do you do when a storm rolls in but try to bunker down and get thru it? And so I did - until the very night Harry died in my arms. For several weeks I battled the anger of my choice to pile on, of all things, a series of outside 'service dog events' when my very own 'therapy kitty in training' was apparently dying right before my own eyes. What had I missed in the days preceding? How could I not perceive Harry was in trouble? Wtih all of my psy skills I've always found it ironic that the most obvious things - those things that hover right under one's nose - are the very hardest to detect. I am saving his full story for the book. Because when it was explained what he did as he crossed - I can only give hint that it actually saved my life. And yes, I have communicated with Harry from beyond. He is currently in an ethereal training camp of sorts, learning how to be of even better service to humanity, before he reincarnates again. And I laugh at Harry's description of his ethereal life now because he was a STELLAR healing kitty, just as he was! I did for several weeks, feel Harry's presence right there in my heart - in a way that cannot easily be expained.
